I wanted to be a man, and I had fantasies about homosexuality as well. So at one point, I even wanted to have a transgender operation so that I could try to love a man as another man.
I thought that if I left God and lived however I wanted, I would be free and happy. But when I look back upon these past ten years, my life had been more hellish than anything else.
At one point, I had countered God, demanding to know why homosexuality was bad, asserting that it was like any other romantic love. But now I've received Jesus as Lord in my heart and have come to know what is truth.
Homosexuality wasn't fate, nor was it merely a preference. It was a terrible sin resulting from being one's own lord. If God hadn't saved me from this pit of homosexuality which goes against His creation order, I would have gone on living thinking that my thoughts were superior.